Elders

Written By Greg Haskins

Mark E. Haskins

September 24, 2025

For many older Christian “sojourners” (Psalms 119: 19 ASV), we find ourselves with a prolonged stopover in Elder City while waiting for the New Jerusalem (Revelation 21: 2). How did we get there? Three points are pertinent to the answer. First, we do not need an officially designated and bestowed title of elder to be one in God’s realm. Second, age alone does not make an elder. Third, we become elders due to the breadth and depth of life’s experiences that we have taken the time with God to ponder, developing an ever more expansive and deep connection with Him. The journey to Elder City is a relational one with Him before it can ever be missional for Him.

Like the travel stickers pasted on old suitcases, we carry the battle scars, the worry wrinkles, the bent bodies from heavy burdens, the gnarled hands from countless and fruitless efforts, and the hoarse voice from many late night appeals to the Lord. But, because of those features, we are beautiful. We are lovely in His sight. Indeed, for many years we have been in the refiner’s transformational fire (II Corinthians 3: 18, Psalm 66: 10), becoming new creations (II Corinthians 5: 17, Galatians 6: 15). We are still “becoming” and we know “. . . that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1: 6 ASV). Thank goodness. Along the way there is, however, evidence that we have learned some of the wisdom of an elder.1

After walking with the Lord for several decades, we know a bit more about the things we once didn’t know that we didn’t know. For example, the following rise in my heart, each remaining a point of ongoing discovery. Might some of these resonate with you?

  • We are more aware of our Heavenly Father’s daily presence and majesty (Psalm 145).
  • We have learned to die to self, inviting and allowing His indwelling Spirit to comfort and guide us. (I Corinthians 15: 31, Luke 9: 23, Galatians 2: 20, John 17: 23, Acts 9: 31, John 16: 13)
  • We know the blessing of forgiveness (Matthew 18: 21-22) and humility (James 4: 6).
  • We more clearly see others as God sees them—precious and unconditionally loved.
  • Elders are like grandparents—more accepting and inclusive, more thankful for each moment, less hurried, more patient, quicker to love, gentle in tutoring, more discerning, and stewards of many meaningful stories.
  • We are comfortable with not being in control and living with trust in His larger story.
  • We know our identity in Him (see May 2025 blog) and look to remind others of theirs.
  • We see each day as a precious opportunity from Him, for Him, and with Him.
  • We know the merits of holding the things of this life loosely (Matthew 6: 19-21).
  • We are savvier about the Enemy that seeks to “steal and kill and destroy” (John 10: 10 ASV)—and just as the ancient Chinese warrior Sun Tzu stated centuries ago, we know our Enemy’s “warfare is based on deception”.2
  • We listen and are curious about others and willing to model vulnerability.
  • We have learned to give our regrets to Him more quickly and totally for His redemptive work (see December 2024 and January 2025 blogs).
  • We have confronted doubt/disappointment, sorrow/suffering, failure/derailment, and perhaps even betrayal. Indeed, we have lived the reality of, “Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.”3
  • We have learned to recognize the idols in our lives (I John 5: 21) and our self-righteous and judgmental tendencies.
  • At our core, we are more joyful, thankful, and prayerful (I Thessalonians 5: 16-18).
  • We know the value of the “ministry of presence”, offering encouragement and care to those we encounter (I Thessalonians 2: 8 and 11).

We are probably each at a different place on some of the above. Moreover, you may even have a slightly different array of meaningful things the Lord has shown you on your journey to Elder City. With some quiet reflection, what’s on your list? In addition, what do we do with the heavenly insights we have garnered? Are they like trophies on the mantel, stationary as once-upon-a-time lessons learned or are they a part of how we live each new day?

As seasoned travelers with Jesus we are where we are and who we are for kingdom-related possibilities. What we have learned about ourselves, others, life, and our Triune God is needed in His kingdom—"Where no wise guidance is, the people falleth; but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety” (Proverbs 11: 14 ASV). We have a role to play right where we are. Henri Nouwen wonderfully notes, “As I grow older, I discover more and more that the greatest gift I have to offer is my own joy of living, my own inner peace, my own silence and solitude, my own sense of well-being.”4 In offering that to others, especially younger followers of Jesus, we manifest Jesus. Oh, to then hear the Lord say to us one day, “Well done, good and faithful servant . . .” (Matthew 25: 21 ASV), for having “… run with patience the race that [was] set before [you]” (Hebrews 12: 1 ASV).

Do we each really have something to offer others that is valuable and needed from God’s perspective? We do! We must pray for the Lord to keep us from ever thinking that we don’t.

Heavenly Father, bless each of us with the conviction that we have something valuable to offer others. Moreover, help us to follow Jesus’ example and to heed the nudges of the Holy Spirit to offer our “elderness” when and where needed. Help us to avoid life’s three main regrets of: “(1) I didn’t live my purpose, (2) I didn’t allow myself to be loved fully and I didn’t love others unconditionally, and (3) I didn’t appreciate the now.”5

We reside in our now—let’s use it. Let’s love unconditionally. Let’s take steps of faith to explore today’s possibilities. Let’s pause and be thankful for His faithfulness and all that He has helped us learn. He wants to partner with each of us. Might that be the reason we are still here?!

Special NOTE: This month’s blog marks the completion of one year of monthly posts from a seasoned Christian perspective for a seasoned Christian audience. I look forward to posting next year’s “Thoughts for Your Heart”.

1 If you are familiar with Zoweh Ministry’s Elder/Sage (E/S) initiative, their E/S webpage notes some E/S characteristics. Moreover, I Timothy 3 and Titus 1 highlight personal traits for appointments to the office of elder.

2 Sun Tzu (2019), The Art of War, (Filiquarian Publishing, LLC, Middletown, DE), p.7.

3 Dave Feherty (March 14, 2021), announcing on NBC television The Players Championship golf tournament.

4 Henri Nouwen (2017), You Are the Beloved, (Vintage, NY, NY), p. 396.

5 Alexa Mikhall (April 13, 2025), These are the top 3 regrets at the end of life, according to a death doula at the bedside of over 1,000 past patients, available at https://fortune.com/well/2025/04/12/biggest-life-regrets-death-doula/ (accessed 6-28-25).

NOTE: ASV (American Standard Version), Published in 1901, in the public domain.

Greg Haskins
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